On the Passing of Lee Kuan Yew

To mourn is to lose. To celebrate is to gain.

To mourn or to celebrate is to move, to move backwards or forwards.

We are constantly moving. We crawl, we walk, we jump, we run, we drive, and we fly. At 5:30am in the morning I wake up, take a shower, and get dressed. I pick my school bag up and walk to the bus stop. At 6:17am, the 74 bus comes. I get onto the bus and find myself a seat – it is usually the second window seat on the left. I fall asleep, or I frantically try to read Great Expectations or Brave New World or Waiting for Godot or Agamemnon. I pass time. At 7:10 – usually – my bus reaches my stop. I alight and walk to school. At 7:17, I am in the school hall all settled. At 7:25, the door closes. Whoever comes after is late; the bus caught in traffic is no excuse.

We stand up. We sing the national anthem and recite the pledge.

We go to class. We go home. We do our homework. We watch a bit of TV, play a bit of game, talk a bit to our family and friends. We go to bed. We wake up in the morning and repeat the cycle again. We keep moving. We mourn and we celebrate.

When have we stopped? Certainly not in exams – we write, so that we can get to the end of the paper. Certainly not whilst queuing – we wait to move, and to get to an end point. We are always looking to the future. But what if we can’t imagine a future? We look to the past. But what if we cannot find the past? We look to the present. We stop and think. We feel.

Sometimes, stasis satisfies.

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About maohui

MaoHui Deng is currently a PhD student at the University of Manchester. His research is interested in the ways in which films about dementia can help further and/or complicate our understanding of time in cinema, gerontology and the wider society. His research interests include time and temporality; the representation of age on screen; childhood and cinema; memory; and the films of Federico Fellini. He is the postgraduate rep for the British Association of Film, Television and Screen Studies. He wants to become a lecturer, hopefully. You can contact Mao at maohui.deng@postgrad.manchester.ac.uk You can follow him on Twitter at @dengmaohui.
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